AT THE WATER’S EDGE:

Prompt: Never Have I Ever. You stick to your guns – now tell us about what. What is something you’ve never done but want to. What’s something you’ve never done and won’t budge on?

Quite honestly, I’m feeling a bit lazy on this post.  I’m on vacation and having a hard time thinking about anything serious!  When I started thinking about things I’ve never done, what popped into my head was the long list of ridiculous things never done by The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything.  If you haven’t heard of them, The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything were Veggie Tales characters, who had a song—which was covered by the band Relient K.  It is their version I will share with you – with lego video to boot!

Below, are the lyrics, along with comments where appropriate.


we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around (lately, it’s been more like go to the beach and lie around!)
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

well I’ve never been to Greenland (but I’d like to!)
and I’ve never been to Denver (not true – you can read about my most recent trip here)
and I’ve never buried treasure in ST Louie or ST Paul (no, but it sounds like a fun idea!)
and I’ve never been to Moscow
and I’ve never been to Tampa (I have, actually)
and I’ve never been to Boston in the fall (hopefully soon, to visit a friend!)

we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

and I’ve never hoist the main sail (I’ve helped Tom do so on our new Hobie Cat sailboat!)
and I’ve never swabbed the poop deck (nope; the term “poop deck” is enough to gross me out)
and I’ve never veered starboard, cause I’ve never sailed at all (well, Tom does the actual sailing)
and I’ve never walked the gang plank
and I’ve never owned a parrot.
and I’ve never been to Boston in the fall

we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

I’ve never plucked a rooster
and I am not too good at ping-pong
and I’ve never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall (no, but I did witness Tom doing this one year in college – we had Thanksgiving dinner with the neighbors and the guys realized they had never done this and thought – “we should!”  I think it’s captured on film somewhere…)
and I’ve never kissed a chipmunk, (I’m happy enough to get one to eat out of my hand)
and I’ve never gotten head lice (thankfully!)
and I have never been to Boston in the fall

(pirate captains log 2002
who be this band relient k
and why they be so full of contradictions)

we don’t know what he did
but we’re down with captain kidd
we don’t wake up before lunch
but we all eat captain crunch
we don’t smoke, we don’t chew
we watch captain kangaroo

and I’ve never licked a spark-plug (this was the line that first came to mind when I was trying to think of things I’ve never done!)
and I’ve never sniffed a stink bug
and I’ve never painted Daisies on a big red rubber ball
and I’ve never bathed in yogurt
and I don’t look good in leggings (that’s debatable, I suppose! =P )
and I’ve never been to Boston in the fall

we are the pirates who don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

we are the pirates we don’t do anything
we just stay at home, and lie around
and if you ask us, to do anything
we’ll just tell you, we don’t do anything

This post was written as part of NHBPM – 30 health posts in 30 days: http://bit.ly/vU0g9J